things here have been random
and haphazard
i have just spent three days trying to tidy the house.
having a rest every afternoon;
well, trying to convince the kids to leave me alone so i can have a rest, or they can rest with me
reading them stories
enticing them to sleep.
we got the books moved and tidied
and the shelf looks pretty pretty in my room; new bedside table
when before there were suitcases.
which were pretty too.
but change it good.
we did not get any of the mountain of clothes put away.
perhaps i'll look at it all again tomorrow and think about it.
perhaps i'll start folding some clothes
and then they'll be pulled apart again
mainly by a girl who wants to wear five outfits a day
or none.
or by a boy who wants to jump up and down on them.
perhaps i'll throw all their clothes out.
and we can only have a small selection each,
with no choice of what to wear each day.
my little creating room is not tidy.
i have a pile of pins stuck into a doll.
kids wanting to make dolls clothes, being creative and all that.

i have a mountain of paperwork
that i just cannot fathom the
motivation
to tackle
or think about.
and the time
without someone moaning at me
is very limited
at the moment.

i want to change our routine
so that we have fun and happy times
combined with times when the kids
will give me space
and quiet
and leave me for just two moments to get something done.
something more than starting a job
or thinking about starting it.
or blogging
and thinking that's working.

perhaps we'll go out in the mornings.
i'm thinking swimming will tire them out.
and a mid-day nap may mean some quiet time.
yesterday the girl slept, falling asleep whining in my lap.
she slept for many hours on my bed.
the boy and i did some stuff together.
chatted and smiled and talked jokes.
then i tried to do some work.
he lay on the floor and moaned.
and then quiet.
and i looked at him
he was asleep.
then, would you guess it,
she woke up
not more than one teeny tiny moment in between.
true.